Neverclear: Student gets stuck on tracks, wrestles police after drinking high-proof alcohol

© Police Photo
A semi-naked Texas teenager who had been drinking the infamous firewater called Everclear tried to wrestle police after failing to start his car with a pair of scissors after it got stuck on train tracks.

Ignoring the advice of many who made the same mistake, a lad named Bond... Connor James Bond… apparently drank half a shaken, not stirred bottle of the rectified spirit, which can be purchased in either 151-proof (75 percent) and 190-proof (95 percent) variants.

After initially receiving a number of reports of a car driving erratically around the Sun Creek area of College Station, the 19 year old’s car became stuck on railroad tracks, local station KBTX reported.

When police approached the car, Bond was sitting naked inside, with his clothes on the passenger seat, and a half-empty bottle of Everclear in the backseat.

After unable to start the car with a pair of scissors, police eventually persuaded the teenager to step out of the car and put his pants back on.

The teen attempted to flee the scene on foot once an ambulance arrived and attempted to wrestle the police officers who tried to arrest him.

Bond now faces several charges, including driving while (really f*cking) intoxicated and resisting and evading arrest.

Fortunately, arson is not one of the charges...

...and a train didn't come along before his car was moved.