Putin on teleportation: 'We should have kept the West believing we're on it!'
Russian President Vladimir Putin said Russia should not have "disappointed" the West by correcting a media report which suggested Moscow may soon have its hands on teleportation.
Russia's work on the much-desired ability to move instantly from one place to another was reported by The Telegraph back in the summer. Saying that a "Kremlin-backed research program" sought to make the technology a reality by 2035, the report said that the "multi-trillion pound" project had been presented to Putin.
"The goal is not as outlandish as it might seem," The Telegraph told its readers. It added that the project could be "part of a new Kremlin drive to boost Russia’s IT sector," not forgetting to link it to "western government" fears that Russian "computing talent" has allegedly been used in "the most fearsome state-sponsored hacking and cyber-warfare programs on the planet."
Vladimir Putin was reminded of the report at a Thursday meeting of the Russian Agency for Strategic Initiatives. When discussing development of new projects, one of its members said the media had reported on teleportation plans out of context and made it sound like "it was a threat to all European countries' national security."
"[You] should not have disappointed them. This idea should have been carried on," Putin replied, smiling.
The Russian agency's plans, which were indeed revealed in the summer, included scientists and IT specialists being set a number of tasks to be completed in the next two decades.
Moscow planned to develop its own programming language, a 5G mobile service, as well as more secure communication systems, and quantum teleportation. The entire project reportedly required the investment of 10 billion rubles ($1.58 billion).
It seems a shame, however, that teleportation isn’t at the top of Putin’s priority list. It would surely be helpful for the instant deployment of Russian doomsday devices and other hellish creations – including giant killer squids which, according to the Daily Express, are being weaponized in the depths of the Arctic.